Bomp BAAAA Ba Domp Ba Bomp PAHHH Bomp Pa Pa DAH BA DOMP Pa Pa Ba Da Domp Bomp Pa Dahhhhhhh

The Olympics start today. I couldn't care less. Usually, I do, but this year the only things I remotely would like to see are the women's soccer team win the gold and I'm sure I could spend some quality time with my daughter watching the softball team play, but other than that, I'm out.

Apparently, they give out medals for ping-pong and badminton. The only thing more boring than "track" is "field." And I don't think those gymnastics where they dance around with paper on the end of sticks should even be a sport. And NBC pays billions to broadcast this stuff...who watches?