I've Got Stains On My T-Shirt, And I'm The Biggest Flirt...
Ashlee Simpson was in concert in Dallas last night and drew a crowd of over 3,000 people. My first reaction was, "Who would pay money to see her?" And then it hit me some of the stupid stuff I've actually paid money to see:
...a "Tough-Man" competition. It's a boxing tournament for anyone off the street, and me and some friends loaded up for one near an Army base in Columbus, Georgia.
...not one, not two, but three professional wrestling events. I saw Hulk Hogan beat Bad News Brown for the WWF Heavyweight Championship. I saw Ric Flair beat Nikita Koloff for the WCW Heavyweight Championship. I saw the Road Warriors beat The Midnight Express (managed by Jim Cornett) in a scaffold match.
...I attended something called a "Rattlesnake Rodeo" in a town actually named Opp, Alabama. The cheerleaders for the local Opp Bobcats actually have a cheer that goes, "O-P-P...home of OPPortunity!"
...The Talledega 500.
...Birmingham, Alabama's many professional football teams: The Americans (World League), The Vulcans (The World League's failed 2nd year), The Stallions (The United States Football League) and The Barracudas (Canadian Football League--in Alabama, no less).
...The Alamo, which might be the biggest let-down on a list of American historical visits. The "tour" is a lady who stands over a glass-encased model who says things like, "Santa Anna's army laid seige in an encampment where the HemisFair Arena currently stands." or "The soldiers were able to hide for a time near the rear wall, which was located on the current Marriott hotel property." It'd be easier to take those signs that talk about the "cradle of Texas liberty" and "gentlemen remove hats" if you couldn't take a rock and hit a Wendy's restaurant from the front door. I don't remember paying, but I remember thinking that I should've worked out in the hotel instead of going.
...a concert involving John "Butcher" Axis, Krokus and Def Leppard (who only had their first two albums out at the time) on the same bill.
I can't believe I put good money out there for stuff like that...
Ashlee Simpson was in concert in Dallas last night and drew a crowd of over 3,000 people. My first reaction was, "Who would pay money to see her?" And then it hit me some of the stupid stuff I've actually paid money to see:
...a "Tough-Man" competition. It's a boxing tournament for anyone off the street, and me and some friends loaded up for one near an Army base in Columbus, Georgia.
...not one, not two, but three professional wrestling events. I saw Hulk Hogan beat Bad News Brown for the WWF Heavyweight Championship. I saw Ric Flair beat Nikita Koloff for the WCW Heavyweight Championship. I saw the Road Warriors beat The Midnight Express (managed by Jim Cornett) in a scaffold match.
...I attended something called a "Rattlesnake Rodeo" in a town actually named Opp, Alabama. The cheerleaders for the local Opp Bobcats actually have a cheer that goes, "O-P-P...home of OPPortunity!"
...The Talledega 500.
...Birmingham, Alabama's many professional football teams: The Americans (World League), The Vulcans (The World League's failed 2nd year), The Stallions (The United States Football League) and The Barracudas (Canadian Football League--in Alabama, no less).
...The Alamo, which might be the biggest let-down on a list of American historical visits. The "tour" is a lady who stands over a glass-encased model who says things like, "Santa Anna's army laid seige in an encampment where the HemisFair Arena currently stands." or "The soldiers were able to hide for a time near the rear wall, which was located on the current Marriott hotel property." It'd be easier to take those signs that talk about the "cradle of Texas liberty" and "gentlemen remove hats" if you couldn't take a rock and hit a Wendy's restaurant from the front door. I don't remember paying, but I remember thinking that I should've worked out in the hotel instead of going.
...a concert involving John "Butcher" Axis, Krokus and Def Leppard (who only had their first two albums out at the time) on the same bill.
I can't believe I put good money out there for stuff like that...
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