Birmingham Chronicles, Day 4

Well, it's time for my annual Christmas review:

Best "Throwback" Gift: Shelby got a sewing machine. I wasn't sure if those things still existed and if they did, anybody knew how to use them.

Best "We've Been Married 40-Some Years" Moment: My mother-in-law, Frances, woke up to watch the girls see what Santa brought them. She enters the room saying, "Murray, have you seen my glasses? I can't find my glasses." Murray, my father-in-law, says he hasn't seen them. Five minutes of searching and Frances notices Murray is wearing her glasses. Murray responds with, "I was wondering why I couldn't see anything."

Best Inspiration and/or Foreshadowing: My higher-order life-liver sister Jilly and her barnstorming pilot husband Shane gave Kelsey a zippered sweatshirt with "Berkeley" across the front, and Santa left her a mug with "Rocket Scientist" on it for her hot chocolate.

Most Predictable, Yet Hottest, Gift: My nephew got an iPod Nano...and we went for the chip-in with Murray to get him one, too. Watching a pre-teen with a Nano call his buddies with, "I've got 147 songs right now (1PM)...how many you got?" is pretty funny. Watching Murray loading his library and then sit and "explore" to see what it would do was fun. Sure, it's "easy" and predictable, but they brought happiness...even if the iTunes website kept causing delays due to so many hits.

Gift That Raised The Most Question Marks: I got a DVD collection from HOLL/BPH Jilly & Shane of a British comedy that aired when I was in college called "The Young Ones." It was one of my favorite shows and I still think it's funny...but no one except the givers had heard of it.

Best Sticking To The Letter Of The Law, But Not The Intent: Shelby, my youngest, is a Christmas junkie. She gets up early and searches underneath the tree by stealth. Can't wait to get at it. Kelsey is 14 and values sleep above most everything not related to Sports Center. Kelsey made a pre-slumber rule for Shelby that she may not touch her or her bed or anything of hers to wake her up. They share a room here. We have a rule that both have to be up before they can see what Santa brought (we act like we enforce that rule, and Shelby acts like she abides by it, so we don't need to fix what isn't broken). Shelby puts her iPod on at 6AM, and then bounces on her bed until it wakes Kelsey up. I'm sure Kelsey will be more specific on her rule-making next year.

Gift That Raised Eyebrows At Brent's Pastor Position: My sister-in-law, the Country Music Lovin' Jodie and her husband, Stephen the Litigator, delivered on the DVD set "Beavis and Butthead, Volume 1." A collection of 40 shows from the cartoon duo. I'd have paid money to hear their discussion before purchasing it.

Best Wistful Reminder: My three-year-old niece reminded me of how great it is to have daughters. We sat in a chair and read books. We laid down on a pallet and watched "Madagascar" and laughed together. She showed me her Cinderalla horse-drawn carriage and would go get me cookies. When I asked her where she got them, she said, "Owt ov de powar beaws bewwy." There's a polar bear cookie jar in the kitchen...could it get any better than having daughters, or nieces?

Conversation That We Knew Was A Farce: After lupper (3PM lunch/supper), we discussed going to a movie. Right. By 7PM we were all saying, "It's only 7? It feels like 11."

Silliest Question: Frances asked me, "You saved the sales flyers when you read the paper this morning, right?" After being around this family for nearly two decades, the one thing I know will happen on Friday after Thanksgiving and the day after Christmas is that the Thomason women will hit the stores for exchanges and bargains. I didn't even respond other than to give her a look that communicated precisely that reality. My daughters both got in on the act this year. They're already gone, and have been for 45 minutes. Late start this year.

Best Reminder That Excellence Comes At A Price: Shelby got a foot massager spa thing...you know, where you fill it with water and salts and it ministers to your feet? Apparently, when serious ballerinas get their pointe shoes and get up on the tips of their toes so much, their feet need to be ministered to. This should do the trick.

Most Repeated Question: Frances, "Did ya'll get enough to eat?" This house has more food than a grocery store...which makes the question truly unnecessary, to boot. We're all laying around groaning about how we ate too much and she fires off her question about every 8 minutes.

Best Observation: Kelsey noted, "Could me and Shelby be any more different? Look at the movies Santa brought us. She has three dance movies. I have 'Mr. & Mrs. Smith' and 'Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.' She got ballet calendar and I got a Rangers baseball calendar. She got dressy clothes and I got workout clothes." I was silently thankful, too. Having them both in my house and getting along so well pretty much all the time is such a great thing.

Best Cliche: I'm glad we did all that...and I'm glad it's over.

And, while I'm at it, I'm continually surprised at how many readers this thing has, and I hope all of you had as wonderful a Christmas '05 as I did.